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re: Hard stuff.....Faithful God
If any of you guys read this and are maybe as clueless as I would be, if I didn't live with the young man in question...
Imagine yourself as a teenage boy again, with the same hormone levels as you had ages ago; except this time, imagine that you have even less, in fact near zero social cues. Imagine that your moral compass spins like a top, mainly because of brain damage that happened before you were born by maybe just a night, but more likely many nights, of carelessness and alcohol.
Now imagine living with a teenage boy that you have to keep in sight at all times. If you don't see the boy, then you have to look and make sure that all the other children are accounted for; because in the blink of an eye, something so devastating can happen, that another child is permanently wounded, that you will never forgive yourself as a parent.
Here are some statistics about FASD (Fetal Alcohol Syndrome Disorders):
Mental health problems were prevalent among 90% of the sample's clients;
Disrupted school experience characterized 60% of the clients, indicated by having been suspended or expelled from school or having dropped out of school;
Trouble with the law was experienced by about 50% of the clients, described as having been in trouble with authorities, charged, or convicted of a crime;
Confinement, including inpatient treatment for mental health problems, alcohol/drug problems or having been incarcerated for a crime, was experienced by about 50% of these clients;
Inappropriate sexual behavior was experienced by 50% of the clients;
Alcohol/drug problems were noted among 30% of the clients;
Problems with employment were experienced by 80% of the clients; and,
Dependent living was characteristic of 80% of the clients. (Independence is defined by either being independent on 12 daily living activities, whether or not a support person is present, and/or not having a support person organizing their lives, not living with a caregiver and being able to handle 9 - 12 daily living activities, including paying own expenses; dependent living is defined as not being independent).
I hate to be so vivid about this, but that is the fear that Paula was being careful to articulate subtly. My anger for the biological parents used to burn every time we had issues. Now, we are just weary.
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by Rick Davis on Monday April 14, 2014
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